Real love looks like a thousand everyday, ordinary things

that aren’t always romantic or written for the movies.

Real love changes the middle of the night diaper,

cleans up vomit at 3 AM,

and plunges the toilet for the hundredth time.

It wipes up the mess on the floor and takes out the trash,

whether it feels like it or not.

It gives love anyway.

We live love any way.  DSC02950

Real love cleans up the dishes

even when it doesn’t want to.

It says I love you when the heart doesn’t feel it

because love is action first, followed by feeling,

Real love is sometimes human touch in this fleeting space,

an embrace out of the blue when that old love song plays.

No grand sweeping gestures.

No fireworks or words written in the sky,

just a counter wiped clean and a cup of coffee in the morning.

Real love reminds you to listen to the conversation

and accepts messy hair and sweatpants,

faults and all.

Throw the he said, she said tally sheet in the trash.

Real love doesn’t keep score.

DSC02997DSC02979 DSC02975

It keeps its mouth shut when it wants to criticize

and says I’m sorry when it speaks hurt instead of healing.

Real love makes mistakes

but also forgives–

always forgives.

Real love pours out unlimited grace.


It takes hard work

remembering to call,

to speak without words: you matter to me,

making time, without distraction,

for you.

It doesn’t hold grudges.

It works through the hard stuff.  It remembers we are human.

It can break your heart. DSC02980

It isn’t the glamorous people sharing kisses in a movie rain scene,

But Real love is a thousand everyday things we take for granted,

A beautiful gift of you

that changes me forever.


6 Comments on What Real Love is (Love on the Hard and Messy Days)

  1. Your words touch the deepest place of every mother, wife, daughter and friend. It is in the everyday moments that God reveals himself and that our character is built. TRUE LOVE is greater than the tangible gifts we seek. It lies at the core of our motives and translates into actions. Your words have captured this truth. Thank you for sharing your heart!

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